It seems simple
enough, but it can be the most
difficult part of a date.
So what do you do?
Biggest clue: THINK AHEAD
You don't want to be standing there going, "Um,
ah." when the object of your affection says "Yes."
You can't just looked stunned and be too shocked
to utter the next sentence.
You can't wait for that very moment to try to
think of what on earth you can do on a date.
You need a more impressive beginning!
If you're at the
start of a relationship or asking
for a first date, take the pressure off by not
using the "D" word.
Don't ask for a "Date" and don't call it a "Date."
If you're uncomfortable saying, "Would you like to
go out with me."
Then don't say it.
Make it casual.
But (just a reminder)THINK AHEAD.
Make it specific.
First - two deadly questions NOT to ask:
Do not ask,
"You want to go out?" it's too
open-ended and can lead to awkward follow up
conversation.
Do not ask,
"What are you doing Friday night?"
It's too vague. It may leave your potential date
wondering exactly what you have in mind.
The other person doesn't know if you're just
curious about what she/he is doing on Friday night
or if you want to do something with them...
Try something
along the lines of:
"You like to rollerblade? I was thinking of going
out to the lake on Saturday. It's great out there.
Would you like to go with me?"
Or if you're
really uncertain or uncomfortable
about getting together - go with a group.
Ask the question:
"Hey, there're a bunch of us going bowling on
Saturday. Would you like to go?"
The operative word here is "us." It immediately
takes the pressure off.
Planning activities to do on your date and getting
together in a group are good ways to go -
especially if you think you or your date might get
"tongue-tied."
If you're busy or there are a bunch of other
people in the conversation, you won't hit awkward
silences and won't have to talk all the time if
you don't know your date very well.
In summary, just remember when you are
asking
someone out:
1) Plan ahead !
Know what you are going to say AND what you want
to suggest to do on the date.
2) Be specific !
The other person will be much more comfortable if
they know exactly what your intentions are and
what you want to do.
AND try to relax
and enjoy yourself - worst case -
they'll say they can't go out and you'll find
someone else who will. Someone who appreciates
you.
In other words, if the person you are asking out
doesn't have enough insight to recognize what a
terrific person you are, then they're just not too
bright now, are they?
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